If you’re like me, you value honesty.
You like it when people tell you the truth.
And whenever possible, you strive to be honest with yourself also.
But one place a lot of us haven’t been very honest with ourselves is around the experience of getting sick.
And not so much the physical experience of getting sick (though there are definitely places we can get more honest with ourselves around that too)…
But right now I’m talking about the conversation we have with ourselves about getting sick.
Language matters.
The way we relate to the words we think, the words we say, and the words we read affect us.
A lot.
And because of the language and words most of use when talking about our bodies, we are in serious Victim Mode around our health.
Take the common cold for example.
(Which by the way, just because it may be common, doesn’t mean it’s natural to experience as often as most people do. A chat for another post…)
When talking about colds we use language like:
- Ugh, I caught that cold that’s going around.
- I can’t believe I got a cold…again!
- I got sick. Grrr!
- I’m sick.
These are very popular ways of describing the experience, right?
But here’s the thing — catching and getting things is not something you do by accident.
Short stops do not accidentally catch the ball on the baseball field.
(These guys are quick and in position at all times and their spidey-sense has to be cranked up to keep them on their toes.)
3-year-old’s do not accidentally catch a ball you toss at them.
(They actually have to try *really* hard to be so coordinated, right?)
Trapeze artists do not accidentally catch their partner who is flying through the air.
(Umm….hello!? There’s some serious preparation involved in this transaction.)
In order to catch something you have to be ready.
You have to be making the conditions right.
You have to be set up for it.
Do you see where I’m going with this?
We do not accidentally catch a cold.
We have to be set up for it. We have to make the conditions right for it in our bodies.
It’s truer to say:
- I allowed myself to feel this way.
- I made the conditions right for this virus to thrive in the body.
- I made choices that led me to feel this way.
It’s about taking ownership, my friends.
It’s not about self-blame.
It’s about being responsible human beings!
It’s about recognizing how powerful we are.
And that if we allowed this type of “sick” feeling in our lives, we can also allow other things in our lives…
Like vital health! Like incredible energy! Like good feelings! Like happiness!
Bottom line?
Getting and catching things (including a cold) requires your participation.
Do not tell yourself you have a stupid cold. (Or headache, or pain in the body, or sore throat for that matter.)
Do not let yourself feel like a victim to the experiences you have in your body.
Instead…acknowledge your participation in how you feel.
You don’t feel the way you feel by accident.
Acknowledge the choices you made that allowed you to experience what you’re experiencing.
Examples if you are feeling sick:
- I let myself get worn down last week.
- I did not give myself enough sleep last week.
- My voice is in whisper-only mode right now.
- My body is doing its amazing thing it knows how to do.
- I let myself get exhausted.
- I am taking extra good care of myself right now.
- I chose to work overtime instead of rest.
These things are more aligned with what *actually* what happened and which are happening.
And they were not accidents.
Other possible ways to describe the experience that you used to describe as “having a cold”…
- My body is taking care of itself.
- My body is being a healing machine.
- I am learning how to take better care of myself.
- I let myself get worn down and now I am healing.
- I am allowing my body return to its natural state of wellness.
Do you see the difference between saying the truth…and lying to yourself by telling yourself in a victim-y way that you caught the cold that was going around and that you are sick?
YOU are not sick.
The body is experiencing things as a result of choices that you made.
Own it, baby!
It’s fine if you want to tell yourself that you caught a cold…
But you owe it to yourself to at least be honest about HOW you caught it.
That it was not an accident. That you set yourself up for it. That you made the conditions right.
Not in a self-blame way, but in an “I am responsible for my life” way!
Choose to perpetuate empowerment and choice in your life.
Refuse to perpetuate victim-hood with your health.
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
I am TOTALLY going to link back to this articles when clients come to me complaining about chronic conditions. “Make me better, but don’t make me change my lifestyle. It HAS to be this way.” I am less than sympathetic when they ignore what their body is so clearly saying, “Take it easy! We need our rest, you know. You really don’t want to be doing this.”
So instead, I”ll link to you, because you are very non-confrontational. Nice!
@Shanna Wonderful – I’m grateful to be able to be a resource for you and your clients in this way. Your clients are lucky to have you looking out for them and wanting to find the best ways to help them make the changes they need to make in order to reach their goals. Beautiful! Lovely! Thank you!
Very true.Actually it goes about anything that happens in our lives not just about cold but any illness,any mental or physical trouble.Very well said,”The body is experiencing things as a result of choices that you made”.
Got the positive view.Thanks.
@Shivali – I’m totally with ya! The results of *anything* that we have in our lives is a result of the choices we’ve made.
So instead of acting like victims to the situation, we can realize that we’ve been powerful enough to create our current situation – which means that obviously we’re powerful enough to create a NEW situation. Super cool!
I have found when I neglect to rinse my sinuses in the morning, I get cloggy and unhappy. So, salty water goes in, cold goes away.
@Jeanie Yep – we’re in a bad habit as a society of blaming other people and other things for our problems. But then when we experience good things, we want to take all the credit. (ha!) It’s a mature person who is able to acknowledge how that our results are due to our choices – whether the results are ones we like or ones we don’t like.
I agree.
I have not caught anything in over 6 years. I am not sure what one thing I can attribute that to, I’m sure attitude is a big part of it, but ever since I started doing the energy and shamanic work I noticed a lot of spontaneous healing and that no bugs seem to gain foothold. Perhaps it’s because I have a flexible schedule and make time to take it easy when I feel off or fatigued. Perhaps it’s the clean air and water and food here at the Oregon coast. Perhaps it’s because I’m happier now (poor, but happy.) Who knows but I know anyone can heal themselves…if only they believe they can.
Totally agree with Shivali – our bodies are such great communicators… if only we would tune in more!
Mona, I loved this post… such a great reminder to take responsibility for ourselves in every aspect of our lives. It’s so important – and can be so hard – to slow down, tune in, and be honest about what we feel is going on.
Jenn Givler recently posted..Too hard on yourself
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